Marianne Klancke: What Happened to Summer?
October 1, 2010
Whether you are young or old, we have all sounded like Ma and Pa in Grand County this summer. Of course I use that reference to the season loosely because what seems to be causing us to sound like such a bunch of old fogies is our obsessive comments and non-stop lamenting about pre-summer and, now, post-summer conditions.
For months our conversations had been focused on scouting and labeling the signs of the coming summer and, then, somehow with a phenomenal Borgness about us, we began bemoaning the passing of our beloved summer season.
Did anyone experience, because I must have missed it, that perfect time and space when we all congratulated the universe for hitting, spot-on, a glorious summer? Was that the day we complained miserably about the heat?
I wonder, then, when, or better yet ‘what’ is a perfect summer? What is “perfect”?
Do we habitually while away our lives in pre-perfect and post-perfect senses of metaphorical seasons, seldom embracing the perfection of the time we are passing through right now?
How can we grasp “perfect?” In life coaching, I was taught that everything is perfect and that a sense of perfection is but an intentional thought away.
Perfect-thinking is a life skill that can make full our pleasure of each experience and every moment.
We do not need to be Zen masters or even idealistic Pollyanna’s to be well served by the development of perfect-thinking and the practice of “now.”
The key to perfect-thinking is not to examine our life circumstances, but to explore our thoughts of each occurrence at the moment it is happening.
To strengthen an energetic propensity for perfect-thinking we must check our constant expectations, tame our even more constant judgments and, then, fully focus on the moments of our lives.
When we are impatient, perturbed or outright outraged, we are obviously not grasping the perfection of that moment.
This is a great time to haul our expectations and judgments front and center and give them a good once over.
There is nothing that screams “imperfect” more than an expectation/reality mismatch.
With our natural inclination to judge everything, we tend to become perfection snobs, confident that we know exactly what is and what is not perfect.
Which is more likely to be perfect, our personal expectations and judgments or the moments that are “now” and real? Reality is what it is – perfect. Reality-perfect can be the most irritating of all because we most often do not expect it and will always stringently judge it against our preconceived thoughts of perfection.
How often does that work out for us in terms of pleasure?
Entrenched in our habitual expectations and judgments, we are most often drawn even further away from perfect-thinking and the excitement of embracing perfect, as it is. Without our expectations and judgments we have the opportunity to focus on actual experiences as they occur, which are always “now” and conveniently one moment at a time.
The “now” experience is that which happens when it happens. As evident as that may seem, it is possible for us to not find pleasure in our life occurrences because we are preoccupied with anticipating and reviewing rather than actually experiencing. Our thoughts can often be in front of “reality” or way behind “now.” We are more commonly trained to think ahead and to draw from our past than we are encouraged to “Be Here Now,” as the wise ones reminded us in the wacky ’60s.
“Now” offers to us a view from the center of perfect. At this perfect-thinking vantage point we will bypass the emotions of expectation and judgment. All of our energy can be applied with no distractions for want of more, or need for different. Waste no more time waiting for perfect. Summer was then, perfect is now.
– Note: Marianne Klancke is a certified professional coach and group development facilitator. What are your coaching questions or communication concerns? She welcomes any comments at email@example.com.