Tonya Bina: Changes in the Zodiac – another sign of the times |

Tonya Bina: Changes in the Zodiac – another sign of the times

Tonya Bina
Off Beat
Grand County, CO Colorado

Just when you thought certain things were constant, our 9th planet Pluto is demoted to a frozen rock, then – Boom! – the earth’s alignment bobbles and up appears Ophiu.. what?

The revised Zodiac, the strange one with the 13th sign “Ophiuchius” (Gesundheit!) between Scorpio and Sagittarius, is a reminder that even the stars in the sky, those ones you’ve seen your whole life, can take you by surprise.

For those who haven’t heard the odd news, evidently for a really long time, our Western Zodiac has been out of sync. Whatever sign you once claimed, you really should be the sign from the month earlier.

It’s interesting how protective people become once they hear their sign may be stolen from them.

I overheard one woman denouncing this news as she wondered aloud what she would do about the “Cancer” symbol she had tattooed above her left butt cheek.

One guy in Grand Lake joked he’d have to re-evaluate his relationship, since he’d vowed never to date a mixed-up Gemini, and now with a single Zodiac shift, it appeared he was.

A young woman in Grand Lake made a squeamish face and said she couldn’t fathom it, that she MIGHT ACTUALLY BE A SAGITTARIUS?! – But she’d ALWAYS been a Capricorn!

And me, every failed romantic relationship was with a Capricorn. To think I almost became one.

I had to worry for Bob, owner of the Mexican restaurant Pancho and Lefty’s in Grand Lake. Bob was born on 5/5/55 – Cinco de Mayo. Taurus’ Bull – a perfect fit for Bob, not some wafty Aries sign.

Then, there was the lady who was OK with the shift, saying she now had a convenient excuse for past mistakes: She’d been operating under the wrong set of Astrological distinctions.

But according to one report released on the day the astrological world shifted – alarming millions who have loyalty to “their sign”- the adjusted Zodiac only applies to those born after 2009. (Disclaimer: Don’t just take my word for it; be sure to consult your local astrology adviser.)

The update shows Scorpio squeezed to a sliver of time – from Nov. 23 to Nov. 29. Could it mean the pool of sexual and passionate Scorpios will be smaller? Supposedly Scorpios are good for the economy. In a recent survey released by Money Management International, out of all the people who splurge with their tax refund, one out of four is a Scorpio. Leos are also big “splurgers.”

I plan to keep my Aquarius sign.

Coming up next on the Zodiac calendar, supposedly Aquarians are honest and can organize a closet like nobody’s business. On a bad day, we’re emotionally detached. One book called us “insane geniuses.” (Should we be worried or flattered?)

Hardly anyone I know really has a solid grasp of astrology, including myself.

Whether one gives weight to astrology or not, everyone seems to know what sign they are.

And for many, to give it up would be like finding out midway through life you’ve been spelling your name wrong.

There are just some pieces of our identities we take for granted.

And when you’ve been hunting for “five-star” days in a certain location for most of your life, it’s just a little unsettling to be told, “You’ve been looking in the wrong place.”

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